I say it all the time, “I am so lucky.” Even though my husband passed away way too young, I am so lucky for so many reasons.
One way that I was lucky- blessed was with the people in my life. I never felt judged by the choices I made following R’s passing. There is only one person who ever said anything negative to me about my relationship with Dr. T, and although it hurt me, I really didn’t expect anything different from her. She had always been critical of me so this was no different.
One thing that grief does is change the people who experience it. I am a very different person than I was before losing R. One of the biggest ways that I’ve changed is in my opinions of others. I feel I was way too judgemental of people. I looked at their lives and formed my opinions because of course my opinion was what mattered… WAIT… Did I really feel that way??
I guess I did, but I don’t anymore. So when I read this recent blog post by The Good Men Project, it really struck a nerve with me. I love what he has written. I love how simple the concept is… When I feel the need to judge someone, I need to “Sit Down and Shut Up.” It really is as simple as that! This post is written in the context of widowed people finding love again, and the people who feel the need to judge them because of it. However, I think it is just great advice for all of us!!
What do you think of this article? Are these words you need to remember?
(click to go out to The Good Men Project)